Move Like A Jelly Fish, Jump Like A Hippopotamus

Now, I'm sure you've all heard he saying, "distance makes the heart grow fonder". I've had first hand experience of this many times in my life, but I have also unfortunately, experienced the contrary. I'm not talking solely about relationships such as "boyfriend/girlfriend relationships," I'm talking about friendships and family ties as well. When people think of distance, they tend to think of measurements in physical miles. Lately, I have realized that there is a sort of invisible distance that can break a friendship ten times more than physical. As time goes by, some people tend to drift apart and unfortunately, this is a part of life.


There's this little thing that apparently only a select few people know about. It's called "effort". You see, as absurd as it might sound, it's imperative to actually try to work at a friendship, or any relationship for that manner. It's unfortunate that people drift apart, but sometimes this can be for the better. When we're waving goodbye to one person, we should recognize that there are others we could be greeting.


I bring this particular topic up because I've realized how many close friends have decided to head in an opposite direction as me. Now, if we were to run into each other, I would not hesitate to exchange greetings, however we are not even half as close to being as familiar with each other as we have been in the past. I've become more aware of all the things that people have to deal with in their lives and it is easy to understand why people fade away or drift apart. The fact of the matter is, the world is ever changing. Some people want to have the same best friends, expect their friends' opinions to stay the same forever, and just think that things will always remain golden forever. 


People automatically get angry when someone they know decides to walk away, but the thing is, sometimes that friend doesn't even realize they're walking away. First of all, we must have patience with people. We don't always recognize everything that one of our friends are going through. Secondly, if we have a problem with the way someone is treating you, speak up. Sometimes the person might be so caught up with school or work or family issues that they lose track of social ties. Thirdly, do something about it. Make a change. If someone isn't as close as they used to be, perhaps it's time to re-tie your relationship, so to speak.


Also, people have different feelings and attitudes towards things (obviously), but attitudes can be changed. Hell, beliefs can be changed. Sometimes, it's not necessary to agree with someone else's attitudes or beliefs, but at least be tolerant. If what someone is doing is not destructive, then there's no reason to cut off the friendship. Things like religion and politics have caused me to lose some really great friends, but there's no reason that should happen. If someone's a really great friend, it shouldn't matter if they are pro-choice or anti-gay marriage. You can disagree with them, sure. But the differences might even make the friendship stronger. The differences in opinions could give both members of the relationship a greater understanding of the opposing person's views.


Bottom line, live is full of decisions. You decide to eat breakfast or not, to blow all of your money on comic books, to wear a checker-board shirt with leopard print pants. Then again, you decide whether or not you go on spring break with Johnny and Calvin, if you should call someone you've been missing, or even take a different route to your next class (who knows, you might run into someone worth your while). Your decisions might only effect you, but others can change people's lives. Some of the most important decisions that you will have to make, are when it comes to the people in your life. We're all going to have to ask ourselves difficult questions. "Does she love me?", "Why is he wasting his life?"... We shouldn't judge someone before we really get to know someone. You might know OF someone, but you really don't know who a person truly is right off the bat. Even a great friend can turn around and stab you in the back, sure.. but I'd rather take that risk on someone who I really care about. Some things in life, you just can not prepare for. Sometimes, the greatest thing you can ever give someone is a chance.


True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island. To find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing. - Baltasar Gracian

Page Breaks and Half-Empty Water Buckets

Poison pours from my eyes, we're on our sixth second chance and I'm soaked to the skin.
I am the best and worst part of you, your strongest weakness. I've only been longing to be someone else. Longing to be someone to lose yourself in. This mutual pain; this mutual love; this mutual desperation for acceptance is breaking me apart at the spine. I can not amble through life knowing that I provide the venom for this sickness.
Broken crystals, shattered and jagged, your irises beg me to be repaired.
You cry for me, your biggest downfall. Refute breaking stride. Maintain your life, do not allow mine to interfere. If you were wise, you would acknowledge the inevitable. Enduring life is my mistake, but a mistake worth making. Be afraid no longer, love, and cry no more for me.
We keep spinning out of control and now sorrows are merging without hesitation.
The cycle never stops, and now I'm lost in the fog in my head. Navigating through the mist and the confusion, a collision is foreseeable. Half of me living, half of me gone, the struggle let's me know there is still something left. We love. We fight. We breathe. We love. We love. We breathe.
This round, deception is not probable. Battle alongside me no longer, for the blood cascading down my fingertips would drive me to obliteration.
Today, being sentient is a voyage that I'm uncertain of embarking on.

Raining Dictionaries and Cutting Turqoise Squash

As I am sure you have noticed, summer is right around the bend, which, being college students means, finals are coming up. As much as we'd like to just run outside in our bathing suits screaming "F#&^@ YOU!", to our professors, we've really got to buckle down. This week has been hell when it comes to studying, and I'm pretty sure everyone else is feeling the pressure. Along with school work, I'm sure many of you have to deal with other situations that have been pushing down your morale. We've snowed ourselves under in a particular class, we've been putting off a serious conversation, or fear of failure is just pushing us against the ground as finals are coming up. I think I speak for all of us when I say that the stress we carry is not always recognized by others, and therefore, not thought of as serious.

The trepidation caused by our fears and responsiblities can be overwhelming. I do realize that I posted something in the past about stress and finding and outlet to help us escape from the tension. Now that finals week is only a week away for me, I feel that I should write a bit more about the opposing side of stress. Like I've said before, stress can be a good thing as well as a bad thing. While we feel overwhelmed, we realize that things need to get done, which is of course a good thing. When you're like yours truly, and stress starts to eat away at you, and you forget to eat and sleep seems to elude you, you are taking quite poorly to your stressors. Now, at the same time I am writing this blog, I am at the same time, trying to releive some of that tension. Writing does serve as my outlet, and I'm working on dealing better with my stress. However, it does come to my attention that there are some people who are focusing too much on the concept of "taking a break", to the point that nothing gets done.

Taking a break, or relaxing is a very good tactic to relieve stress, but a strategy I am working on currently is one I like to call the "get shit done" approach. Basically, get shit done (pardon the French, but I need to be blunt with this). If something needs to be taken care of and it's stressing you out, try to get it out of the way as soon as possible. For example, if you have a speech you need to give in a class, volunteer to go first or second to get it out of the way. Things are a lot less stressful if you get a head start on things. Do not procrastinate. I know everyone can taste summer on the tips of their tongues, but that shouldn't change the way that you are going about your day. If anything, you should be trying to take care of everything possible so you don't have to worry or be distracted near the end of finals week. 

I've got 2 weeks left of classes, and this is the first day of "dead week" at my school. We have no homework or quizzes or new material being introduced. This is a week set aside for studying. Now do you think that everyone takes advantage of this? Absolutely not. There are people who are carelessly wasting their time hanging out with friends or skipping class to go do some random crap, well I say that when finals roll around, they might end up their decision to not prioritize. Here is my last words of advice, because you won't find me writing in this for at least 2 weeks:

Though it would be much easier to put studying off and enjoy the weather, just buckle down and get what needs to be done taken care of. There's not much time left this semester, so try to finish strong.

“Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.” 

-Lyn Yutang

Don't Eat The Whales and Remember to Tip your Waitresses

Bored at work, so here's some lame poetry:

True emotions amble in fear of rejection, as her thoughts become condescending.
Her logic overpowers her muffled heart, yet the blades in her eyes spill her blood.
Meditating with the mind and not with the soul, her true self still begins to emerge.
Comprehension dissipates as her heart materializes in a miraculous resurrection.

Large diamonds fall from her eyes reflecting a thousand pieces of her face;
The challenge of gazing upon her lingering reflection causes her to wince in pain.
Kissing her forehead, you lean in unaware of the knife already dug through her chest,
Your advancement pushes it deeper and with "I love you," you provide the final twist.

Fighting Elmer's Glue and Punk Rock Porn Stars

This is my Philosophy paper that I was required to write. I want to state beforehand that I posted this because I wanted more use out of a 4 page paper and I wanted more people to see it other than my teacher who happens to have a horrible hair cut and terrible hygiene. The information expressed does not necessarily explain my views, but it states the opinions and arguments between atheists, theists, and agnostics. All information was found in my philosophy book, Lawhead: The Philosophy Journey: An Interactive Approach, Fourth Edition and is cited throughout the paper. I highly doubt anyone will read this, but I thought it was pretty damn interesting.

            Imagine that you have just heard the news that someone you dearly love has just had their life taken from them by a hit and run; your only son or daughter. The pain that you feel in your heart is almost unbearable. You can’t sleep, you can’t eat, and some times you find it difficult to even think straight. In an exasperated breath of despair, you start crying. You ask yourself “Why is it that things such as this are allowed to happen?” Why would God let such pain come upon you, and why would He take the life of your dearly beloved family member? This question and questions similar are asked more than you might initially think. People are constantly questioning why God would allow evil to exist in the world. The problem of evil has always been a controversial concept since as far back as man kind can recall. We naturally want to understand why innocent people suffer and the search to find the answer causes us to dig deep within our minds and even challenge our faith.

            There are distinguished evils that philosophers have been able to place and categorize different situations into. There is Moral evil, which consists of bad actions such as lying, rape, and murder. Moral evil is caused by such things as loss of property, poverty, physical and emotional harm, and distrust. Then, there is Natural evil, which consists of things such as diseases, tornadoes, genetic defects, earthquakes, and other things of that nature. Natural evils are the evils that atheists usually pose more arguments towards. If God loved every one of his creations, why would he allow an earthquake or a hurricane to devastate and kill hundreds and even thousands of his people? The problem of evil is used as a major standpoint and gives argument between atheists, theists, and agnostics.

Atheists often argue that if there was a God who was Omni benevolent, omniscient, and omnipotent, evil would not exist. Atheists take notice that evil does exist, and therefore, God does not exist. In order to claim that this argument is false, one of the premises must me considered false. The Greeks claimed the premise of God’s goodness was false, and therefore, it was easy for them to understand the presence of suffering and pain. If the Greeks believed that God was all-loving, it would be far more difficult to understand why there was so much famine and war in the world.

            Many theists argue that knowledge is limited and that even God could not anticipate every evil that could possibly occur. This still is subject to flaw considering that once someone has made their intent known for evil, God could stop them. There is a difference between “God is all powerful”, and “God can do anything”. For example, God can not create a round square. God is incapable of bringing about things that are logically impossible. He can not create a stone so heavy that He could not lift it. Saying that God could do what is logically impossible, is saying that He could do what is good and evil at the same time. If this were possible, it wouldn’t be possible to think that God would exist at all.

            “The greater goods defense is the claim that God allows some evil to exist because it is necessary to the achievement of a greater good” (Lawhead: The Philosophy Journey: An Interactive Approach, Fourth Edition 372).” This argument claims that good could not be reached if some evil was not allowed to exist. The idea is that the suffering that we experience always has a purpose. It is difficult to answer every question when it comes to the problem of evil and we can not explain every particular evil that God allows.

            John Hick’s version of the greater goods defense is more along the lines of us, as humans trying to fulfill the divine intention of our existence and we are still in the process of creation. Men may become perfect eventually, but Hick’s argument states that we must all go through a process of “soul-making”. One of God’s most important gifts that he has given to us, is the ability to make a choice. God put us here and gave us the power to turn towards him and be turned into a “child of God”, or to turn away from him. Hicks’s argument states that either God was to have a world where we suffered a torturous amount or God could have created a world where there would be no suffering at all. If God were to create a world where there was no suffering and no evil, then that would mean some of our free will would be sacrificed. This thought shows that even God had to make a choice.

            There are some criticisms towards Hicks’s argument, of course. Hick assumes that God’s choice is between one extreme or another. As Edward H. Madden and Peter H. Hare stated, “Even if some underserved and unnecessary suffering is necessary to make possible compassion, it is obvious that a minute percentage of the present unnecessary suffering would do the job adequately.” Also, Hare and Madden have stated that though in life there is “soul-making”, there is also “soul-breaking,” because people are often crushed and hurt by suffering. Not everyone can handle suffering, and end up turning into worse-off people because of it.

            Another very important defense for the problem of evil topic, is the “free will defense.” Basically, this defense states that though God allows evil, it is necessary in order to give his creation the capability to choose. God gave his children the gift of free will. God chose to create a world in which his creatures can make choices at their own will, which in turn, allows there evil to exist. This defense states that if God took away our free will and turned us into his own righteous pets, in a sense, we would all no longer even have the capable of questioning God. The freedom that God has given us, has given us the choice to choose right from wrong; good from evil. God took a risk in creating us, and he could not necessarily guarantee that we would all follow on the path to goodness. Evil exists because, if it did not, we would no longer be free agents. This defense states that the world would be a better one if there is free will, as well.

            There are many questions and oppositions to this defense, however. People often ask why God could not just have created Heaven and have that be all. If Heaven is a place where you have eternal life and no longer commit sin, which it is described as, why could He not simply create a place like that on Earth? God could intervene and make it so we would not commit such sins as rape and murder, could he not? “A moderate amount of human freedom and a moderate amount of moral evil might make a better world (257).”

            Though the greater goods defense can support reasoning for both forms of evil, the free will defense views evil as caused by immoral choices made by humans because we have free will. This defense addresses slavery, murder, and rape, but at first glance, it seems as if this argument does not have a reason for natural evils such as hurricanes, earthquakes, and diseases. “One way in which a free will defense can account for natural evils is to say that in order for there to be free choices, whether these choices are good or evil ones, there has to be a fixed, reliable order of natural causes and effects (257).”

            The evil that is allowed to exist in the world, is necessary in order for free will to exist. We can think of a place where God was capable of making it so we were incapable of making wrong choices. We could imagine a world where God could turn a weapon into something unable to harm someone else when we intended to use the weapon to harm someone else. We could picture a world where God refused to allow any bad or pain to come to someone innocent, however if God were to do such things, it would interfere with the entire concept of free will. We wouldn’t necessarily be able to make our own decisions because we would be limited to what we could think or do. God allows us to make decisions and sometimes people decide to kill other people. If God were to intervene, that would make it so we didn’t have free will, but limited will and evil thoughts would be impossible. As difficult as it is to comprehend, if a person has made the choice to murder someone, that is that individual’s choice. Now, it is not necessarily true that God should allow someone else’s life to be in someone else’s hands, but by bestowing us with free will, He took a risk. God, by giving us free will, risked that we would make some bad decisions that might eventually lead to us committing some evil deeds.

            Many people are incapable of understanding the atheist’s viewpoints. It is difficult for many religious people to understand how someone can live their lives thinking that there is no divine purpose to living. Those who are not theists, feel that there would be no sense of gratification or happiness brought about in their everyday lives if they were to think that there was no divine purpose to their lives. If there is nothing greater that we have planned for us, then our friendships, family ties, and other relationships are meaningless. However, there are many atheists who are good, moral, and caring people. There are many atheists who even do volunteer work and donate their time and efforts to making life more enjoyable for others. Just because someone believes that there is no God, does not mean that the person has to be an unjust and evil individual.

            Atheists often find difficulty understanding the presence of evil if there is a presence of God. They often feel that there shouldn’t even be a need to justify innocent children suffering. If there was an all-powerful and all-loving God, agony and tragedy would not happen to innocent children. Some of these “explanations” wear thin when trying to explain to a suffering child, that the reason he or she is suffering, is because it is God’s will. Atheists 

The Atheist argues that the theist says that the world needs a cause to find an explanation for the unexplainable. Before the rise of modern science, the world and it’s people “worked” in different ways. They used to believe that all natural events, such as disease and the moving of the planets were all caused by God’s activity. Some atheists believe that since the rise of modern science has proved so many things wrong, that it could be possible that God as a hypothesis is invalid now. If suffering is a part of God’s plan, then we shouldn’t fight suffering, but accept it. We are then fighting against God’s will and therefore trying to push back against something that has a greater, divine purpose.

            “Some atheists argue with the psychiatrist Sigmund Freud that religion is a psychological crutch that emotionally weak persons use to get through life. (259)” Religion does help people cope with many things. If a theist loses someone they love, it’s much more comforting to think of that person as “in a better place.” Atheists believe that there is a larger explanation than “it is God’s will.”

            The presence of evil in our world causes much controversy. We can not help but wonder why bad things happen and what kind of a God would allow an innocent child to contract such life-threatening diseases as Cancer or Leukemia. One thing that we all have to recognize is that some questions are unable to be completely answered. There are some things beyond our control or understanding and we can try to come up with an explanation, but sometimes, we just have to have faith. The way I see it, it is not necessarily that atheists do not think that there is not a God, but they believe there is no God. In a sense, they have faith that there is no God.

            Atheists, agnostics, and theists are all working towards the same goal: to answer the unanswerable. There are no answers in the back of the text book for them to check. They are simply trying to answer questions to make life a better place. The explanations to the unexplainable, must simply be thought of, but followed with our faith. Through our own faith, we will find the answers whether that be faith in God, or faith that there is no God. To understand why the things in life are conducted in such a manner; to understand why someone’s child is dying of a fatal illness. There are more things in comment between the three, but people tend to only focus on the differences. Yes, there is a strong possibility that we may never live to know the truth, but the fact that we, as humans are longing to gain wisdom and understanding, should pull us together and allow us to live fuller and richer lives.

Surround Sound Fire Extinguishers

Internal battles are probably the most difficult to face. There is a constant struggle in your head between your thoughts; Thoughts bent on pushing you forward or pulling you back. We have a hint of exaspiration to our voices, we break apart during seemingly insignificant circumstances due to our overly sensitive and exhausted thinking process, we lay in bed into the wee hours of the morning running through almost impossible senarios, just because we're afraid. We're afraid of failure, and we're afraid to make the wrong decision. I know this story all too well, and I do recognize that I'm not the only one who goes through this. I've missed out on so much in my life simply because I was afraid to take a risk. I'm one of the most indecisive people you'll ever meet, and I do realize this. Sometimes, you just have to act on a whim. Sometimes, it is alright to follow your instinct.

So many people have the problem with making up their mind and taking a chance. Some people, including yours truly, have tried over-analyzing a situation so many times over that the answer simply becomes more clouded and far away. Not every risk that you take will result in failure, and if you don't get out there and live your life to it's fullest, what's the point in living? We are not on this Earth long enough to ruin a great thing because we are too concerned with making the right decision. You learn from your mistakes, and if you do not make mistakes, then you're not really living. Thomas Edison had over 1,000 failures before successfully inventing the light baulb. When he was told this he simply replied, "I never failed, I just discovered 1000 ways not to make a light bulb."

We give up too easily on ourselves, and I completely understand how throwing in the towel can seem like the easy way out. When the struggle has you beat down and you're miles away from the finish line, keep going. Crawl if you must, but don't give up. There are far too many reasons to take that risk and keep moving. I used to just turn down anything that seemed even slightly out of the ordinary, but ever since my mother got sick, I've realized that there is just too much in this world that I want to do, so many things that I want to see, and so many people I have yet to meet. Now, I know this might seem a bit cliche' but truly take my word for it, as soon as you get rid of the negative thoughts in your head, you are free from the shackles of your own personal prison. So often we are victims of our own negativity and our own fear.. So often we fall down, not because our biggest road block is in our own head. In order to succeed, failure is always a risk. In order to live life, we must take risks.

We are all fighting every day. The mind is a complex thing, ladies and gentleman, at least for the people who use theirs. We can develop certain mindsets, feel uncertain, be unsure.. but we can also have motivation and eventually reach success. One good thing about facing this struggle is, we're all together facing the same battle. We're just on different battlefields. We can talk to our friends; our commerades. We can get help fighing, and we can beat what is stopping us from taking a risk. Speak your mind, take the leap, run the mile. It might seem difficult to do, but it is easier with someone fighting alongside you.

Death is inevitable, but there is no use dying before we are called to leave. To me, there are two kinds of death. There is death of the body, and death of will. If we don't fully live our lives and try to make this world better, we're not really living. Life is difficult and there are so many things that could potentially go wrong, so why make things harder on ourselves by not taking chances? Why add more weight on our shoulders? We can not carry the world.. we are only human, but that doesn't mean that we can not do great things. We can do amazing things, but we must first overcome our internal struggles before we can face any external problem. If you fear everything, and you do not take chances, you already have failed.

Yellow Blowfish and Tempting Banana Muffins

Now, I realize that I have a tendency to repeat myself, however, I also have realized that people have a tendency to drive me crazy to the point of repetition. Has anyone realized that we have the same poor habits that they managed to develop as children? Sharing, kindness, being polite.. it seems that no matter what, we've still tainted these thoughts and ways of life. I've never really understood what is so difficult about holding a door open for someone or thanking someone for picking up a pencil you dropped. What's the big deal with just going out of your way for someone. Going out of your way to lend someone a dollar, a hand, or  just an ear does not take as much energy as you think. Just by holding the door open for the person behind you, is all you have to do to put a smile on someone's face. Class in America, to me.. no longer exists.. and if it does, then it is endangered.


I've recognized the lack of class in America at a young age. My father and I were always staying up and watching old movies with Clark Gable, Elizabeth Taylor, Jimmy Stewart, Bette Davis, Humphrey Bogart, Cary Grant, Maureen O'Hara, and Katherine Hepburn all dressed in their best. In these movies, there was a certain essence of elegance that engulfed the actors and actresses. There was a certain beauty to these men and women, and even the general concept of their movies were remarkable. Nowadays, it doesn't matter what colors you are wearing, but it matters how little you have on. Women today lack a sense of class... and the children are picking up our bad habits. Most men apparently WANT a women who lacks class.. and yet again.. this social accepting thing falls towards our children. Maybe what I am hoping for is a fairytale, but maybe, it just takes me speaking up to make at least one person aware of how horribly things have changed.


Just imagine things how they used to be for one moment, please. All the men in suits, and all the women in dresses. you got paid 25 dollars a week, and that was a LOT of money. More people were concerned with elegance and grace, then being concerned with "showing some leg" or shooting up some building. Don't get me wrong, there will always be those select scum bags, but back then, life was better.. life was happier. Perhaps this was just the way things happened back then, and perhaps things will never change for the better, now that everyone's low-brow. I have faith, though. I know that someone, somewhere, probably understands what I'm getting at by all of this. I'm not being unrealistic. I know that things have changed. Style has changed. I get that.. but does that mean that our characters have to change as well? Our values have to be subject to this change as well? I mean, okay people, you don't have to go around saying "golly gee!" and "By golly!", but is there really harm in opening up the car door for your girlfriend every once in awhile? What happened to courting a woman? I just wish things weren't as sloppy as they are now is all. So call me unrealistic, I just want people to be classy again.


I know this was a short post, but I had to change my topic because someone else just posted one on what I was half way through writing about. Nevertheless, I think I've made my point. I was thinking that I'm just talking to myself, considering this is such an outrageous concept now, but who knows, maybe I'm not the only one left who wishes that the world had a little more class.


Click here, it explains what I'm thinking.
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To keep your character intact you cannot stoop to filthy acts. It makes it easier to stoop the next time. --Katharine Hepburn